Saturday, 12 October 2013

The 3rd Girl



Not all of us are conceived in the hope of a boy. But I was. Most certainly I was.

I felt it as I came into her room. The hushed sense of disappointment. I hear it now too, but in whispers. Makes me feel a little unwanted, and even after 19 years of my life. I’m not complaining, though. It’s just how things are, I have grown up to realise. When the first born is hoped to be a boy, and at least the second, the third girl is thrice removed from all things welcome – a reality we live in. I live in. Perhaps you too?

I love her. My mother.

I sit and try to imagine.

I try to imagine the expression on my mother’s face when the nurse must have announced to her – It’s a girl. Or maybe – It’s another girl. ‘Another’ becomes ‘just another’ after a row of 2 others. They say so, but I hope it’s not true.

My mother. Was she disappointed? ...

[To read more, please click here]




25 comments:

  1. Wow, that was such a beautiful post, chronicling the thoughts of a third daughter in an all girls family. Loved the last line where you say that "I want a girl. I only want a girl.

    And I will show her my smile as soon as she comes into my arms.

    No, I will not cry. I will dance."

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    Replies
    1. Thanks a lot, Jairam. You have an angel at home. You will know what a blessing it is. :)

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  2. Really lost for words (and in a good way :)). Beautiful post there Sakshi (might I add, as usual!). Oh, I wish I had a daughter so I could dance around (well, it's never too late I suppose)

    Sid

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    Replies
    1. Never too late, really! :D God bless your family, Sid.
      Thanks for reading!

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  3. My aunt who has no daughter, just a son...always says how much she wanted a girl. You can never dress up boys and they start moving on with their lives too soon.
    Daughters are always special :)

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  4. How beautifully you got into the skin of her character, Sakshi. For a few lines, I thought it was autobiographical. There are so many girls like her.....when the rejection is not open, it's subtle and hurts just the same. Great ending!

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  5. I have a kid brother, Corinne. While this was not autobiographical, it was biographical for I was thinking aloud thoughts someone shared with me once. She no longer works for me, but used to share her life stories quite freely. Her love for her mother used to shine through all her misgivings. :) There are indeed so many girls like her.
    Thanks for stopping by!

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  6. it provides a male chauvinist with an alternate perspective!

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  7. Beautiful post Sakshi. The way I see girls taking care of their parents and making them proud, son fixation will see a decline. Sadly, it is going to take decades. However, sensitive posts like this one are a step in the right direction. No wonder it is the top post on Indiblogger. It deserves to be there.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Alka.

      And I hope the son fixation will die a natural death soon enough. It just makes no sense.

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  8. Lovely post ! Had already read this women's web..hadn't seen it was yours !

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  9. Sakshi - thats indeed the sad truth even in so called "educated" families! The struggle I see parents going thru to get their daughthers married! Maybe a time will come when marriage is no mor ethe be all n end all of a womans life n then the parents will stop fretting!

    Thankfully the fixation around only sons will look after aging parents is slowly dying down - due to of womens economic independence

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    1. Oh yes, Mina. Rightly said. I see cupboard full of degrees - of parents and even of boys getting married, but I guess going against the grain is not so much about 'certificates on the wall as it is about Courage, social courage and Will, to stand by your own principles and your child's. As for those young men earning fat wallets after degrees in exotic lands, shame on their desire to be sold off for a car, and more!!

      Yes, that fixation of son is my old age staff is dying down.

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  10. Hmm... Very nice, touching story. Now, this mentality has changed in some families, is changing in some other and yet to change completely... I hope that every girl on the earth lives her life happily, without any fear! Yes, I hope!

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    Replies
    1. I hope with you too, Sindhu. Thanks for reading! :)

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  11. Beautifully written Sakshi ..

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